Cell phones for kids are becoming a social norm, but are you helping or hindering family communication and independence in your child when you purchase a cell phone for their own personal use?
There are many marketing messages that are used to promote the notion that cell phones for kids will improve your family life. Each message can be countered with the argument that having a cell phone may interfere rather than help your family communication and building of capacity for independence in your child.
Message #1 - keeping in touch with your children is a way to promote family communication.
The importance of communication in establishing a health family life cannot be underestimated but is talking to each other a lot the way to do this?
In actual fact cell phones for kids do nothing to improve family communication because talking a lot does not necessarily result in good communication. If you want to establish good family communication a lot more than technology is required.
What is communication exactly? Communication is about making sure you are understood and that you understand others. It has nothing to do with being able to talk to somebody whenever you like. Good communication is established by how you listen to and talk to your children, not by how often you talk.
What children really need, and want, is to be heard and understood. They need to be certain that you think they are so important that you are willing to take the time to sit down and listen to them.
Message #2 - You can feel closer and more connected as a family.
Creating meaningful relationships is actually better accomplished through face to face contact. Non verbal communication and connection with other people is extremely important in establishing true rapport and understanding.
You need to actually be in the presence of someone else to get all the nuances of what they are saying.
Message #3 Cell phones for kids help to build independence because you can let them do more things on their own and still keep track of them.
Being able to be in contact with parents all the time may actually interfere with self reliance and personal problem solving capacity. Instead of having to rely on the consequences of personal decisions your child has a constant lifeline for help, so why not use it?
Cell phones for kids act as a umbilical cord that may prevent the independent spirit and skills that are needed to be away from you.
If you are wondering if cell phones for your kids is a good idea, you might want to balance this decision with some of these negatives that come from having you instantly available to your children through the modern technology of wireless communication.
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