Montag, 6. Mai 2013

"Why Did The Nun Have Sex With A Coachman?"

The Naughty Horse-Drawn Coachman

This is a funny sex story narrated to me by my Grandpa who originally got this story from his own Big Daddy.

Sister Anne has just arrived from Manila at the sleepy town of Sariaya. She was then looking for a Horse-driven-carriage ride going back to the Convent - her home, which is situated in a remote barrio, about four miles away from the carriage terminal.

As dusk approached, Sister Anne, who was apparently worried about the looming nightfall, was haggling impatiently to the lone coachman in the terminal as she begged for a ride. "Mr. Coachman, can you take me to the convent with your horse-driven carriage? I'll pay you more than the regular fare just to get me there!" the nun bartered. "I'm sorry Sister, my horse is already tired and I have to go home now", the coachman begged off. "...and it's too dangerous for us to travel in that area especially at night because of the frequent sightings of some rebels!"

Sister Anne, however, was very insistent. She had to get back to the convent surely before dark otherwise she would have no place to stay overnight. "Mr. Coachman, please!! I'll give you extra tips or anything you want just to help me go home". As soon as she replied the coachman suddenly had a random thought - a nasty thought indeed.

He turned to Sister Anne and uttered his proposition. "Okay, Sister, if that's what you want I'll give you a ride but on one condition". "Yes, Mr. Coachman, what is it?", she asked fervently. "For every fart of my horse while on our way to your home you will have sex with me!" "Oh, my Lord!" she exclaimed as she did the sign of the cross. "Well, let's forget it Sister, if you don't like the idea we have nothing to talk about! I better go home now!" "Oh, wait! Wait! Yes, Mr. Coachman, I agree now!" she expressed dejectedly but hopefully murmured, "Its only four miles away and I sure hope the horse will not fart while we're on the way ".

And so, Sister Anne and the coachman traveled by the horse-drawn carriage and made one mile, two miles, three miles journey. And the horse did not fart. There was only one more mile left to reach Sister Anne's destination and she was very thankful that the horse did not seem to have sign of any indigestion.

After reaching half a mile of the remaining trip, the horse suddenly burst into one single fart, and the coachman smilingly turned his head to Sister Anne." Sister, my horse already farts!"

Sister Anne was so afraid of the sexual deal but she had to give in to the agreement. And so, they had quick sex together over the horse-drawn carriage.

As the cart continued its journey, the horse farted anew, and it did every so often.. and the two had sex together again and again. A successive flatulence of the horse ironically cropped up as they came closer to Sister Anne's home. The horse repeatedly passed wind but the coachman did not even lift a finger. He did not even talk to the nun as if he never heard anything.

Partially bowled over, Sister Anne commented, "Hey, Mr. Coachman, your horse has repeatedly farted, and maybe you never noticed it!"

The poor coachman faintly replied,, "I am no longer concerned about this pest horse! It better die by loose bowel movement!"

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